Chapter Six: In Doubt


Zelgadis barely had time to blink before he found himself back on the bridge. According to the lunar position, he had been gone merely half an hour. The party was still in full swing, which would be to his advantadge. No one would notice him missing until it was too late. Maybe he had made a difference, but Lina was stronger now, with spells like Ragna Blade and other such magics under her belt. She wouldn't need him anymore. His task was finished, all he was now was a hinderance.

He silently slid into the celebration, noticing several people, including Gourry and Amelia, had passed out from the combination of exhaustion and alcohol. Lina was nowhere in sight, but it was pretty much safe to bet that she was beating the pants off somebody in a drinking contest. He sincerely hoped that when - if - she passed out, some kind-hearted soul would put her to bed anonymously. He got what he was looking for quite easily.

As quietly as he head slipped in, he left the party and made his way back to the bridge. His heart was pounding, pumping adrenaline through every inch of his body. All that was left to do now was wait for the right time. From his earlier calculations, the right time was when the night sky became gray to foretell the coming of dawn. With a tired sigh, he sat back against the guard rails to rest. His final plan would take all of his strength, and he could not afford to botch is up.


Everything was in place when the sky began to lighten. His icy blue eyes were frozen on the spot where the sun would rise, and chest rose and fell from his slow breathing. In his hand lay the weapon, which he then balanced between his knees.

"Light." He whispered, and a thin blade of golden illuminescence sprouted from the hilt. He steeled his nerves as he brought his wrists to the sharp, glowing edges.

"Oi, Zelgadis, were you out here the entire night?" Lina yawned, walking out onto the bridge. The chimera looked up in surprise, stashing the weapon in one swift movement.

"Zelgadis?" She drew closer to him, traces of concern and pity laying in her eyes. "What are you doing?" She caught sight of his bloody wrists, gasped, and lurched forward to clasp his hands.

"Let me go." He growled, eyes narrow.

"No!" She snapped, white magic dancing around her hands. He ripped his bloody wrists from her grasp, his glare every bit as cold as the northern glaciers that never melted.

"Leave me." He snarled ferally.

"Why, so you can bleed to death?" A sparkling tear fell from her scarlet eyes.

She's crying over me! He realized. no, no, No, NO! She's not supposed to cry! She's not supposed to care! The numb feeling in his hands began to work it's way up through his arms.

"Zelgadis, look at me!" She shook him roughly. "Look at me, damn it! I. Will. Not. Let. You. Go!" She snatched his wrists again, white magic rushing between them. She held his bloody hands up to her face, holding them along either cheek to disuade him from moving.

"Do you hate me so much?" Every bit of his demon part lashed out against the holy magic. "Why can't you let me be selfish? It has nothing to do with you, Lina!" He pulled away again, but she grabbed his head between her palms and forced him to face her.

"Look at me. Listen very carefully." She commanded. "I need you. What part of that don't you understand?"

"You don't need me!" He shouted back, disbelieving her words and dismissing them as trash. "No one does! I used you, and you know it!"

"So?" Her voice went alarmingly quiet. "People use me all the time. Knowledge, power, companionship... it's all the same. After a while, you stop caring about it. You used me for all the above. It's forgiveable. I..." She looked away, another tear hitting his icy fingers.

"You what?" He asked softly.

"I used you, too." She whispered. "I draw my strength from yours, Zelgadis. You are my confidance. Without you, I would never have survived the first battle with Shabranigdo. If you die, I die. Do you understand now?"

"Lina..." The rapid loss of blood made it hard for him to focus. Wounds healing or not, soon, it would be over, and he would be free... wait. Free from what?

"I'd die without you." She was sobbing now, holding tightly to his shirt. "I will die without you. Please, please let me heal you. Please!"

In the corner of his mind, the chimera realized that her tears were runing down his stone skin. She was so close, he could feel her breath on his throat. It was warm and gentle, soothing against the frigid feeling in his chest. Was this what he wanted to escape from?

"Zel, please!" She was nearly hysterical, raw energy crackling around them, waiting to be turned into a spell. "If you won't let me heal you, I'm going to let this power destroy me too! I won't live without you!"

"...Li..." His eyes closed slowly. "...na..."

"Zelgadis!" She screamed.


And the world was bathed in white light.


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