It all started with dinner.
Lina Inverse and her mismatch gang of friends were sitting around a long table having a reasonably quiet evening.
Things were going rather fine. Lina hogged most of the chow, since nobody was crazy enough or stupid enough (with the sole exception of Gourry, perhaps) to try and snatch any of it away.
The inn that they chose so happened to have a buffet dinner, and an all-you-can-eat-and-drink bar, much to the delight (and later despair of the innkeeper) of Lina and a fair number of her friends.
The drink that was bottomless chilled in two huge bowls right in the middle of the (earlier) very well laden buffet table, and was a punch of mixed fruits.
Lina, Gourry and Amelia stuffed their faces at paces better left unsaid and in manners DEFINITELY better left unsaid. Martina, Zangulus, Filia, Valtierra, Milgazia, Zelgadiss and Xerross ate at rather reasonable (and much more dignified) paces and with much better manners.
Quite suddenly, we are back at the buffet table, listening in on a rather hot bit that has EVERYTHING to do with the mess that just has to be coming. "Liena, I love you!" a geeky, bespectacled gangly lad whined to one hot redhead babe.
"Well, I don't," Liena snapped, looking haughtily away. "You're ugly, you're boring and you're as blind as a bat, what could I ever find to love in you?!"
Geek blinked, and tears falling down his freckled face. "But that's all on the outside! Why won't you give me a chance?!"
"Get lost, Geek!" Liena pushed Geek away and swayed to a hunk of a blonde (No! Not Gourry!). Geek banged into the table and spilled some punch on the back of his shirt, although he's too miserable to care. His head suddenly goes up, an ominous fire burning in his beady eyes.
"Fine! If she sees it that way!" he huffed, pushing away from the table and getting more punch on the back of his shirt. He stuck his hand into the pocket of his breeches and pulled out a tiny vial with a swirly mist inside it. "I guess I have to get serious!"
Geek (Mind you, this is not his true name, but it works) then looked around. "Now, how to get her to drink this...? ALL I need is a drop into any drink..."
"Hey, Liena!" the voice of Hunk called. "Where are you going?"
"To get a drink, Shan," Liena purred as she headed back to the table and Geek.
Geek's face broke into a devious, gleeful grin. Perfect!
Geek grabbed at a glass and filled it with the punch, he set it down and unscrewed the vial. But just as he was about let a drop of it drip into the glass, he crashed into the table again and the vial tumbled into the closer of the two bowls.
No! Geek screamed silently.
"Oops!" a silvery voice said, and Geek turned-
Another redhead stood next to him, she wasn't as sexy as Liena, but, man! Liena wasn't half as cute as she was. Her eyes were the next thing that caught him, hook, line and sinker. They were huge, and ruby-hued, sparkling and dancing in the way Liena's brown eyes would never match. And they were dancing and sparkling at him, something Liena's eyes never did when she looked at him-well, she NEVER did look at him, but her eyes weren't as striking as this. And she was smiling, too! And at him!
WOW, what a cute smile, he thought dreamily.
"Sorry 'bout that," she grinned now, and Geek lost himself in her eyes again. "Uh... no p-problem..." he stammered.
"Great!" she laughed.
"Hey, Lina!" another tall oh-too dashing blond yelled from a long table. "Could you get me some punch since you're there?"
"Yeah, me, too!" a chorus of calls erupted around that long table.
Lina... what a lovely name, Geek stared as Lina scowled.
"I can't carry that many glasses, you guys!" she yelled back at them. Suddenly, she snapped her fingers and grabbed one of the two punch bowls, namely the one right beside Geek. "Well, bye!" Lina cocked her head in farewell, her hair that was the most magnificent shade of red, like a blazing fire, swirled around her face as she turned back to stroll to her table.
Geek waved, smiling stupidly, hand picking up the glass that he had filled. The glass was snatched away. "Thanks, Geek," Liena sneered. "But don't think I like you now."
That was when Geek realized something. Oh NO! he shrieked in his head.
He turned wildly to the long table. I HAVE to get a glass of that if I want Liena to fall in love with me!
He shuffled over, watching as Lina set it on the table and everybody began filling their glasses with punch. He prayed that there would be enough left for him. There was.
Geek started to sigh, saw the rest quaff their glasses but froze when Lina filled her glass with it.
NO! Have to stop her! Can't let her drink it or Liena will never fall in love with me!
"Uh... excuse me," Geek began shyly to Lina, tapping her on the shoulder.
Lina looked at him in surprise, stopping, her head tipped back, the glass just touching her mouth. "Yeah?"
"LINA! I LOVE YOU!"
Geek watched in horror as the glass Lina held crashed and shattered onto the floor, spilling the precious punch. Lina stared, dazed at the man who had glomped her.
"Zel?!" she screamed in utter amazement, and squeaked just as the purple haired man who had been sitting beside her latched onto her, too.
"NO, LINA!! I LOVE YOU MORE!!!!!!!
"XERROSS!!!"
"NO, FAIR LINA, IT IS I WHO LOVE YOU TRUEST!!!!"
Lina looked about ready to faint, either from lack of air since three very tall men were hugging her or shock, Geek idly wondered if it could be both. "Milgazia?" she whispered.
"FIEND, RELEASE HER!"
"YOU RELEASE HER!"
"I SHALL NOT!!"
"LET GO, SHE'S MINE!" Zel joined in.
"Geh..." Lina managed, beginning to look a little blue.
As Geek watched, a blond girl suddenly glomped the purple-haired man. "Xerross! I LOVE YOU!!" she began to tug at Xerross who screamed back at her. "Well, I don't! LET GO!!"
The blond girl wailed stubbornly. "Yes, you do, you just have to realize it!"
"Oh, Zelgadiss-sama...!"
Now, a purple-haired girl, who had a haunting resemblance to Xerross, latched onto Zelgadiss.
"Let go of me!" Zel yelled.
The girl giggled. "Oh, Zelgadiss-sama..." she sighed, as though she hadn't heard him, burying her face into his neck.
WHACK!!!
Geek winced as Xerross went down, the blond girl had suddenly whipped out a mace from underneath her robes and bashed him on the head.
"OH, Xerross-love!" she crooned, glomping him happily. "I knew it would hit you eventually that I'm the girl for you!"
Geek sweatdropped.
Filia screeched suddenly as the all too dashing blond Geek remembered seeing earlier glomped her.
"Oh, Filia! I LOVE YOU!!!!" he cried, crushing her to his chest-incidently, he also ended up embracing Xerross' head along with Filia. He wriggled joyfully as both Filia and Xerross approached nice shades of blue.
Man... that was one heck of a love potion... no wonder that peddler told me to be really careful. I shoulda listened. Geek rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. I better do something, and fix this mess.
Geek winced again as Filia got loose and used that mace of hers on Gourry, (he heard the name amidst the bashes), shrieking like a fishwife.
And fast, Geek finished. Filia stopped suddenly, only because she caught sight of Xerross crawling away.
"AND JUST WHERE ARE YOU GOING???"
"TO MY LOVE!!"
"I AM YOUR LOVE!!!"
"NO, YOU ARE NOT!!!"
Geek got outta there fast when Gourry bounced back and joined the wrestling match. Right into-
"SHEIFYL, I LOVE YOU!!"
Now who is it?! Geek thought, and ducked quickly as a green-haired man dashed past him and latched onto Sheifyl who was still glued to Zelgadiss.
"Zelgadiss-sama!!" Sheifyl wailed. "Help me!"
"You can have her, Val," Zelgadiss told the man.
Sheifyl looked devastated. "NO! You must love me!" she sobbed.
"I DO!!" Val cried, distressed by her tears. "My love, don't cry!" he tugged at Shiefyl. "He is not worthy of your affection!! I am!!"
Sheifyl stubbornly clung to Zelgadiss. "No, NO!! I love him, not you!! Let me gooo!! Zelgadiss-sama!!!!!"
Val was stronger than he looked since the next moment, Zelgadiss went flying to hit the table and smashed it to bits as Val gave one powerful tug and got Shiefyl.
Thus, leaving Lina in Milgazia's sole possesion.
Milgazia smiled sensuously at the gasping Lina, hugging her close and again stealing her breath away.
"Now, my sweet lady of fire, that love has chosen true cannot be doubted, let you and I-"
"STOP!" Geek watched as a short-haired girl jumped onto a chair and struck a pose.''I, Amelia Wil Tesla Sairune, Princess of the kingdom of Sairune, cannot allow this to continue! Milgazia, Elder of the Gold Dragons, release her! She is unworthy of your love! MY love is FAR FAR truer!! You may look in the highest of places, the lowest of planes, my love for you will burn like a sun that will never die!!! Eternity will not last as long as my love!! Now, I will show you and let the world be the witness of the depth and purity of my love for you!!!"
Amelia leapt at Milagazia-
And missed.
Amelia's boot smacked into Milgazia's face, taking out the blond man. Lina shrieked as she was tossed up and away as Milgazia's arms let go of her. She's going get hurt if she falls to the floor! Geek, ever the gentleman, threw out his own arms, trying to catch her. He did.
Geek tumbled to the floor, Lina landing on his lap, dazed, her arms tossed loosely around his neck.
"Thanks," she panted. "You..." she trailed off, as her gaze went back to the melee around the long table.
Xerross and Zelgadiss had managed to get rid of their 'loves' and were staring at them. They did not look happy. "Uh oh."
Geek peeked over her head, Zelgadiss, Xerross and Milgazia were looking at him and Lina. No, scratch that, glaring fit better, and at him.
Uh oh, I'm in trouble, Geek thought the obvious.
"What are you doing with my Lina-chan?" Xerross asked, his voice honeyed, taking a step closer to them.
"Yes, I was wondering the same thing," Zelgadiss joined Xerross, his voice soft and just as deadly. "What are you doing with my Lina?"
"That would make three of us," Milgazia said as he advanced alongside Zelgadiss and Xerross.
Geek choked as Xerross revealed his eyes. They were a glittering violet and cat-slitted. Mazoku. Oh man, I REALLY did it this time. Geek gulped hard.
Xerross smiled. "You know how it goes with us Mazoku, we get rid of the competition. In the most painful way possible."
Zelgadiss smiled. "We humans don't, but I'm not totally human either, sooo..." he grinned, his sword moving to level at Geek. "I think I could make an exception this once."
Milgazia nodded. "I am a Ryuzoku, and we challenge each other to see who is worthy. The stronger one wins."
"Why don't we get rid of the weaker competition, then? And move on to settle it between ourselves, ne?" Xerross suggested, looking at Milgazia and Zelgadiss, they smiled back.
"Agreed."
"Of course."
They turned to Geek.
Help. Geek prayed. It came.
Lina jumped off his lap, and grabbed him. "Let's get outta here!!"
They beat it.