They were here, finally here. But where was Here??
No idea.
In place of the ground there were gentle wafting mists, in pastels no less. The sky was in various pleasing shades of the rainbow, complementing any and all skin tones, Zelgadis' included, and the landscape was widely dotted with just the right amount of aesthetically pleasing groups of overhanging trees. Flowers wafted by, birds chirruped happily, and soft music played.
Zelgadis twitched.
He had 'found' some directions to his cure a week ago (a Golden meteor with engraved directions had bonked him upside the head) and it had led them, Lina, Gourry, Amelia, Xelloss, Filia, and Valgarv, into this strange pocket dimension that for some reason did not allow any major spells such as the Dragon Slave or long distance teleporting. Which was perhaps for the best, Zelgadis thought as he looked back at the others, while brushing yet another flurry of some annoying cherry blossoms away from his eyes.
"Will you people hurry up?!" Lina-tachi looked up at him, collectively shrugged, and sped up the pace to crest the hill...
"What the @#$%?!" Valgarv started.
...Where they saw what was appeared to be a free-for-all with all the fanaticism and rabid intensity of a holy war in the valley below.
Several voices floated from below to where they were standing.
"Gimme that!!"
"NEVER!! I'M the only one that'll give him the cure!!"
"HE DOESN'T NEED THE CURE YOU IDIOT!!!!!"
Everyone sweatdropped and looked at Zelgadis, who raised an eyebrow, shrugged.
"Don't ask me..."
His soft, resonant voice carried across the valley, and there was a sudden pause in the war of fangirls as all movement in the valley stopped.
Then thousands of heads slowly turned to look up the hill, and thousands of eyes blinked.
"Kawaiiiiiii..." someone whispered. The sound was carried by the wind to all parts of the valley and to the hill above.
There was a deep, startled silence. A deep, startled silence as thousands of pairs of eyes gazed up to be transfixed by the adored figure standing there.
A gust of wind quietly blew from below, gently catching up his cloak to let it impressively flow and ripple, as the clouds parted to let a single shaft of sunlight illuminate the handsome figure clad in beige, light that serenely slid down that violet, metallic hair, light that the dark colored stones of his skin captured; the honeyed light reflecting and sparkling from hidden depths within. Yet this sparkle from the dark depths pale in color and vibrancy to that amazing luster shyly glimmering from those wonderful sapphire eyes that tightly held in the grief and anguish of untold years, an aching luster that sang a siren song to all who would stroke away that horrible grief with their lips. Soft violet and blue cherry blossoms delicately swirled around him, and light, poignant music started playing in the background...
...during which the whole field of eyes suddenly sprouted little pink hearts.
There was a deep and startled silence.
"ZELGADIS-SAMA!!!!!" someone suddenly screamed, breaking the silence, running up to them as Zelgadis blushed, "I HAVE YOUR CURE!!!" She was suddenly tackled by several others.
"No!"
"Don't give it to him!"
"Stop! He has to accept with love and compassion and human companionship!!"
"Preferably MY human companionship!"
"HEY!!! No fair calling dibs!"
"Give that cure to me then, you slut! Gimme!!"
And in the midst of the minor war, a several voices raised in a delighted squeal, ("He's so gosh darn kawaii!!") and several others took up a rather popular debate involving the sensitivity, texture, and...ahem...firmness of a particular...(uhh)...area of bluish stone...
Everyone started giggling, with Zelgadis flaring bright red in the background, until the horde of fangirls got over their surprise and charged up to them.
While Zelgadis started nervously backing away, everyone else prepared for a fight or at the very least a riot.
Only to be totally caught off-guard by another group almost as large at their backs.
Awhile before...
Someone sighed as they looked down at the rampaging group of fangirls fighting over Zelgadis' cure in the valley below.
"Suuuuure, they have SOMETHING to give to Zelgadis, but what could we ever offer to Xelloss-sama??"
There were many nods of agreement from the just-as-large group of fangirls that was gathered in and around an unusually-large-but-still-aesthetically-pleasing grove of trees.
"I mean, what could we possibly..." the owner of the voice looked up from her contemplation of the gurgling brook and suddenly opened her mouth in shock. She made a weak, strangled noise and pointed to a hill overlooking the small valley.
There, a tall figure stood, priest's robes gently billowing out with the wind that bore the floating petals of a rose so deeply red that it was almost black. A shaft of sunlight broke the clouds above and almost reverently hovered over the highlights in that silky purple hair, yet the light seemed to more hide the figure in it's warm embrace than illuminate him, gently caressing those elegant cheekbones and jaw line. Hidden power radiated from his stance, lazy yet alert, with a feline grace that shamed the cats themselves. Eyes like the cat as well, tempestuous eyes normally hidden by innocent and carefree smiles, briefly opened to gaze with amusement down the valley; amethyst gemstones capable of being harder than diamonds or as soft and seductive as velvet. An endlessly mysterious figure, as compelling as a force of nature, breathtakingly beautiful as the rays of light kissed his head and shoulders amidst swirls of deep red rose petals and soft violet mist. Music started softly playing in the background...
...as hearts sprouted in thousands of awestruck eyes.
"Xelloss-sama..." someone whispered reverentially.
"But what can we ever GIVE him?!" another fangirl wailed, "He already has everything!!"
"Everything??" still another one murmured, as she called their attention to the rest of the group.
"Lina!"
"Or Filia?"
"Or Zelgadis!"
"Valgarv!!"
"Amelia!!"
"AMELIA?!" Sputtering.
"And WHAT is wrong with Amelia??? It's CERTAINLY better than Zelgadis!!"
"WHAT?! Zelgadis and Xelloss make SUCH a kawaii couple!"
"Now THAT is just SICK!"
"And you think that setting him up with Amelia ISN'T?!"
"Then set him up with Filia!"
"FILIA?!"
A heated argument ensued.
"Uh, people?" a voice asked timidly, "What's wrong with just one?"
The thousands of fangirls paused their discussion and exchanged glances.
And smiled evilly as they picked up some handy nearby ropes (don't ask. trust me, just don't ask) and snuck up behind the unwitting group of adventurers.
Fully concentrating on the rabid horde in front of them, Lina-tachi was unprepared for the just-as-determined-and-rabid horde coming up behind them.
Faster than they could blink, through the advantage of sheer numbers and surprise, Lina-tachi, with the exception of Xelloss, was bound and gagged.
"How interesting..." Xelloss murmured as he looked at the group, bound and gagged, placed at his feet.
"Xelloss-sama?" one of them piped up, "We weren't sure which one you wanted, but thought that you probably won't mind if we got you all of them...do you like our gift???"
The horde smiled sweetly. Xelloss smiled back; open eyed, to their utter delight.
"WHAT?!" Everyone with the exception of Xelloss and his fangirls screeched, or tried to (most of Lina-tachi being gagged).
Zelgadis twitched.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN GIVING ZELGADIS-SAMA TO THAT MAZOKU?!?!?"
"But don't you think they make such a KAWAII couple??"
Zelgadis twitched.
"NO! LINA and ZELGADIS should be together!!"
Lina raised an eyebrow at Zelgadis, who only blushed.
"What about Amelia??" some voices yelled out, only to have quite a few people stare in astonishment. "What??? What's wrong with Amelia?!" About half the group twitched.
"Anyways...back to the subject; HOW DARE YOU TIE UP ZELGADIS-SAMA!!"
Things degenerated from there. And was not helped by the fact that the Valgarv fan-club had also arrived just as Lina-tachi, with the exception of Xelloss, was freeing themselves. But between the fighting and infighting, successful and unsuccessful glompings, screaming, and the "acquisition" of "souvenirs" (i.e. capes, gloves, shirts, belts...) by the fangirls; and somehow in spite of all of that Lina-tachi finally managed to get away.
"Umm, Zelgadis-san, what about your cure?" Zelgadis himself was running beside Amelia, currently lacking his cape, most of his shirt, and parts of the bottom of his pants because of several overly eager souvenir hunters.
"Amelia, at this point, I actually don't care."
"Awwww, Stone-boy doesn't like his adoring public??" Lina was currently dragging Xelloss along by his hair, the Trickster Priest being the only one with both power level and knowledge to be able to pull them all out of this dimension. Otherwise they would have just left him to the aforementioned "adoring public."
"Why, I'd have thought that you'd have been pleased. They're so nice! I mean, don't you feel all warm and fuzzy and loved?? Or at least warm and fuzzy? I seem to remember a few of them quite liberally plastering themselves all over you; after, of course, a few of them had shredded your shirt. Quite enthusiastic, ne?"
Major sweatdropping.
"And I didn't see you complaining at all; in fact, I am very, very certain that you rather enjoyed yourself back there..."
"Shut up fruitcake!"
Xelloss smirked.
"And to THINK that some of them actually offered all of you to me! They're so considerate!! I wonder if they do delivery? It would be more convenient if you were all just sent to my rooms at Wolf Pack Island...although less entertaining than just coaxing you there myself. However, I suppose that the fun of actually chasing and pinning any one of you down in my bedroom would more than make up for that." Xelloss smiled.
"!@#$%!!#^$%*!&^#*@$$^#!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"Why thank you!"
"LOOK!!!! THERE THEY ARE!!!!" a voice yelled.
Lina-tachi sweatdropped and started running faster.
"Ya think we're safe here?"
Valgarv and Zelgadis was hiding in one of the thicker groves of trees, Xelloss having already been reclaimed by the fangirls and the group having been separated in the battle. They stared as a group of fangirls chasing some guy in a tuxedo and later another group chasing a red-head with a longish sword entered then left their field of view in the space of a couple of minutes.
"Safe?? Safe?? Hard to say; depends on your viewpoint, really."
"No. Not safe. Never safe, na no da." Startled they looked up, and met the slightly crazed eyes of a blue-haired man in priest's robes.
"Wha..?"
"Chichiri, no da." the man looked around warily.
Zelgadis and Valgarv looked at each other and shrugged.
"They're everywhere..." 'Chichiri' whispered, "They have pictures of you, know everything about you, and they just keep coming and coming..." he paused and looked around again, "It's just not natural, no da."
"CHICHIRI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" A horde of fangirls unerringly came rushing up to the base of their tree.
The man's eyes grew large.
"Sorry, no da, gotta go!" He quickly disappeared.
"Awwwwww, he disappeared again!" One of the girls that had ran to the base of the tree pouted.
"But at least we have Tasuki and Hotohori!!" another one cried smugly, and promptly glomped onto a red-haired man being dragged along who looked somewhat grumpy.
"Now, Tasuki, don't you start thinking of escaping again, you KNOW how fast we got you last time, and if it wasn't for Chichiri's kesa we would have got him too by now..." the girl who was speaking suddenly looked up the tree. "Hey, I think there's somebody up there." The whole horde looked up.
Blinking all around.
"Ya know, they're kinda...kawaii..."
Impromptu music softly played in the background as the sun, for no particular reason whatsoever, appeared from behind a cloudbank, illuminating the trees and the figures within. The bits of sunlight danced in a game of hide-and-go-seek among the leaves and dappled violet and aqua hair while playing tag on the bared chests of the two partly dressed bishounen. Various flower petals in complementing hues drifted lazily by and the sudden wind rustled the leaves, their clothes, and their hair just so.
Alarm bells went off in Valgarv and Zelgadis' heads and they leapt from the tree and took off running.
The fangirls blinked then smiled evilly.
"Hmm, they can't teleport, now can they??"
There was several nods of agreement.
"And I don't suppose that their own admirers would actually mind sharing, now, would they?"
There were several innocent looks.
"Well then, shall we??"
Several grins answered her.
They took off running.
Now, THAT was a little bit of insanity that I never thought I'd dream up...true, the stuff I dream up are usually much more insane, but this particular brand, shakes head I suppose can only be weakly explained by too much leftover Halloween candy (yes I still have some, and no they're not stale. At least I hope not. ^^;;)... I'd originally planned to get more anime series in, but it seemed to interrupt the plot line too much. What plot there actually was. sweatdrops
I dunno, it was just a bit of a spoofish thing exploring my own obsessiveness involving bishounen.
Not that obsessiveness is bad. ^_^