" 'Dancer, " Zelgadis matched her stride as she headed back to the square "why didn't you model that outfit?" 'Dancer shot him a dirty look. "Because I'd be exposing less if I just ran around in my bra and panties." Zelgadis made a sputtering sound. "That's not something I'd want to see." he murmured softly. 'Dancer spun around and slapped him with considerable force.
"Ah-munph!" She choked as she held her hand. "Do you feel better?" Zelgadis asked coldly. A tear dripped unnoticed off her face. 'Dancer turned her hand over and grimaced at the sight of the pebbles' imprint.
"Much." She said sweetly, making a fist. She ignored the sound of her joints crackling in protest. "If you're just coming to watch me make a fool of myself," She glared up at him, shaking with rage, " DON'T bother." She stormed off.
She was 4 blocks from the square when something tried to take a bite out of her. Leaping back she bumped into Zelgadis, who shoved her to one side.
"DEIM WING!"
The piranha-carp, ('Dancer recognized it with a start), slammed into the side of a building before sliding to the ground, a mess of red and gold scales.
"Still want to go in alone?" Zelgadis asked softly.
"Why didn't you tell me about all this?" 'Dancer whispered furiously at Zelgadis. In front of they was the square, jammed with people standing around wearing listless looks. Patrolling the perimeter were the piranha-carp. Zelgadis shook his head. "I didn't know. I only suspected something was wrong this morning." 'Dancer gasped. "Esta manana?!?!?! You knew all this time and you did nothing?!?"
"Down."
Both ducked as a fish cruised leisurely by the back alley they were hiding in. 'Dancer impatiently fidgeted behind the pile of cast away cartons screening them from view.
"It was just a suspicion. And I tried to tell you, but there were too many people around." 'Dancer said nothing, looking at the ground. "What happens now?" She asked in a subdued voice. Zelgadis peered through a space between cartons. "Now we learn what Deidra has planned." 'Dancer looked up to see Deidra, dressed in red robes, walking on stage. Following her in grey robes Jo, carrying a large leather tome. Zelgadis stiffened.
"What?" 'Dancer nudged him.
"Do you remember what the abbot was trying to summon in that legend?" 'Dancer thought for a second. "Yeah, a Dark Lord or something like that. Say, didja ever find those temple grounds?" Zelgadis nodded. "You were on it the entire time." 'Dancer shot him a surprised look. "Aya, the square." She muttered under her breath. She peered intently at Deidra. "What's she-" "A summoning spell." Zelgadis said curtly, listening. 'Dancer took the hint and shut up. Deidra finished abruptly and threw a handful of sparkling dust into the air. The ground began to shake and as 'Dancer clung to the alley wall for balance, a single monolith thrusted out of the ground and through the middle of the stage.
"It's a sacrificial alter." Zelgadis said tightly, before 'Dancer could ask. "She's planning to summon the Hellhound."
"How do you know?" 'Dancer asked, then immediately wished she hadn't. His poisonous glance wasn't something she relished. "The book, the alter, the fact that the alter has the symbol of the Hellhound on it."
"Sorry." 'Dancer held up her hands in apology. "Let's get outta here, 'k?" Zelgadis shook his head. "We need to stop her."
"No-, Zel-, why ? If she's planning to summon a monster, and she's obviously gone through a lot of trouble, she's not gonna stop just because you asked her to." Zelgadis gave her a searching glance.
"Do you know what the Hellhound is?" He asked, watching her reaction. 'Dancer sighed.
"Legendary dog the size of a small horse with three heads and a breath weapon."
"No, the Hellhound is a Magma Hydra with nine heads each with a separate breath weapon. It can instantly regenerate lost limbs and severed limbs can regenerate whole new Magma Hydras. Shamanistic attacks have no affect on it and black magic only does half damage. It feeds on death-fear, and I'm told that dying to it is very painful. It can also depopulate a large city in a matter of seconds, and a region in minutes. And once it's released..." Zelgadis spread his hands to emphasize the finality of statement. "It takes the combined efforts of the Gods to teleport it back to the realms of Hell. And in case you've forgotten, you can't leave this town."
Deidra opened the tome and began reading aloud. "Casting time is about ten minutes." Zelgadis pointed out.
"Aya." 'Dancer groaned. "I'm in this whether or not I want to be, no?" She sighed. "You've got a plan?" She asked, noticing the glint in his eyes. He nodded. "But I need a diversion." 'Dancer grinned maliciously. " That I can arrange. Give me five minutes, 'k?" She called softly, running down the alley. Zelgadis gave her a thumbs up sign.
Four minutes and 57 seconds later, Zelgadis was still waiting in the alley. "Where is she?" He grumbled to himself. Something skittered down the alley. Twisting around, Zelgadis found the largest, fattest piranha-carp barreling down on him.
"Che."
"Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls of all ages, I thank you for coming to the Annual Fashion Festival!" 'Dancer's voice rang out over the square as Zelgadis worked his sword out of the fish's head.
"Huh?" Standing on the roof of one of the buildings, dressed in a teeny hot pink halter top, almost non-existent neon green miniskirt, and elbow length silver cape, was 'Dancer.
Diosa, this is embarrassing. "Oye, Contract, does this count as an audience?" Dancer asked, hefting a microphone. "Affirmative."
"This little number goes out to Lady Deidra. May it haunt you to the gates of Hell." 'Dancer drew a breath and sang;
"Pappara funi-funi
Pappara hoe-hoe
Pappara funi-funi Eggs!
Pappara funi-funi
Pappara hoe-hoe
I grill them and they burned!"
"How dare you try to hex me!" Screamed Deidra. She pointed an elegant finger at 'Dancer. "Kill her!" Half of the school (flock?) turned and slowly charged 'Dancer. By no means the laggard, Zelgadis Dug Hauted the lowest of the remaining fish, then cast Raywing.
"Tottemo tottemo kuaruna anata ni
An an sukkari muchuu
Uttori nettori haato go dokkiri
Choppiri Misechau wa
Tenki ga ii kara
Dokka a ikitai
Yan yan onegai kilte
Uhhun tokubetsu gouka-na
Ranchi wo
Dokka de ageru"
'Dancer sang as the fish closed in. So, you wanna play? She grinned wickedly as she whipped out a pair of sharpened darning needles from her hot pink thigh high boots. Below Zelgadis flew over to the alter and snatched the book out of Jo's hands.
"Ah not the tomato, it's mine
I'll give you the octopus,
I hate the way it looks"
Just shifting side to side, 'Dancer dodged the cumbersome attacks of the slow moving piranha-carp, and poked each one as it flew by. Suddenly the air was full of zipping fish unable to control their actions. This is more fun than blowing up party balloons and letting them go! 'Dancer smiled gleefully. Zelgadis meanwhile was being chased by some of Deidra's statues. "Get the book back!" She ranted as two of them where smashed to bits by a Deim Wing. Suddenly the mindless mob joined in the pursuit. His Ray Wing spell expired, Zelgadis lept on a dying piranha-carp and spring boarded to the roof of an other building. 'Dancer, not to be outdone, lept onto the back of an unscathed fish, and placed a well aimed hole in it's back. Riding the dying piranha-carp down, she belted out the last verse.
"Kaochuu Cheer!
Graduation, hurray!
Withing in agony
7 wins, 8 losses
Survival of the fittest
Yakiniku set the meal
Ah not the eggs, they're mine
Oh eggs! Eggs!"
On the last "Eggs!" 'Dancer lept off the fish and aimed a kick at Deidra. Instead of smashing into Deidra's face, her green heel slid across the top of an invisible shield.
"Damn, AT field!" 'Dancer twisted midair and managed to land semi-gracefully.
"Ow!" 'Dancer blinked. She'd landed on Jo's sprawled out form. "What did you do to Jo?" She demanded of Deidra as she stepped to one side. Jo wore the same vacant expression as the rest of the crowd. Deidra fixed her with a superior look. "It's just a complacency drug." She sniffed. 'Dancer drew herself into a defensive pose, "Deidra, you're min-ack!" Clinging to her leg, Jo looked up at her with misty eyes. "Oh, Miss Saisan, that's # 13! And it looks so good on you! ... I didn't know you had a phoenix tattoo on your butt." 'Dancer shook Jo off as she reached up to touch it. "Jo!" She said between clenched teeth, "I left the matching headband back in my room, at the Inn. Could you go get it?"
"Certainly!" Jo said, leaping up and dashing off. Deidra sighed. "It's so hard to find good help these days." She said mournfully. 'Dancer glanced around. Zelgadis was still involved in some rooftop combat, so 'Dancer set her sights on Deidra. "You're going down." she growled. Deidra smiled benignly. "Wrong, darling, you are. BEFIS BRING!"
Zelgadis turned in time to see 'Dancer disappear down a hole that had opened up underneath her. " 'Dancer!"
"Now for that other nuisance," Deidra cast Levitation. And the seas with their deepness.
"If you'd be so kind as to retur-" The eruption of a geyser, combined 'Dancer's reappearance, robbed Deidra momentarily of speech as she was slapped across the face with a wet cloak.
"Idiota!" 'Dancer called over her shoulder, leaping off the collapsing column of water. Deidra crashed to the stage behind 'Dancer. The moment 'Dancer hit the ground though, she keeled over and curled up into a ball, holding her stomach.
"What's this?" Deidra asked, standing up and prodding 'Dancer with her foot. 'Dancer just groaned, trapped in the throes of extreme nausea. Deidra burst out into a high pitched laugh. "Can this be? The little sorceress suffers from spell-sickness? Oh, oh, this is too rich!" She cackled, almost bent double. Then she straightened up. "Really, I'm disappointed in you, Miss Saisan. You should be...Ashamed."
'Dancer felt a shock of electricity move through her. Her ears and face burned even as she felt the chill of displeasure seeping into her bones.
" 'Dancer, it's an illusion, fight it!" Zelgadis called over the chaos that descended on her. That's easy for you to say. Every painful memory was dredged out of the depths of her mind. 'Dancer flinched as each shame threatened to bury her deeper and deeper in self-pity. Desperately she searched her memory for a single proud moment. Self-pity became self-loathing, and in her anger 'Dancer ripped the fabric of her mini skirt.
"Paragraph 56, Section B, subclause vii of the bylaws states that damaging an article of clothing is a breech of contract and you are to be fined 10 gold pieces." The ridiculously calm voice broke through the noise in 'Dancer's head.
"Like Hel! I completed the contract when I put on this stupid costume!" She howled. There was a pause while the contract checked itself. "That is correct. This contract is no longer binding and legally void. Have a nice day." 'Dancer sat up with a start. The slight buzzing sensation was gone, along with her stomachache. Her argument with the contract had broken the Shame spell, she noted ruefully. Standing with her back to her, Deidra watched the rooftop battle. Zelgadis was fending off the crowd of people and the remnants of Deidra's statues admirably. 'Dancer stood painfully, and raised her hand to strike the designer.
"So glad you came back. And here I was entertaining some...Doubts."
'Dancer halted mid-swing, uncertain of her aim. Even as she dropped her arm she had a hard time vindicating her actions. What right did she have attacking the very woman who'd given her employment? And who exactly was Zelgadis? He seemed to know an awfully lot about the Hellhound for a disinterested third party. Was she positive that this wasn't some great scheme of his to take over the world? Wouldn't Deidra be in the way? Besides, could she really take down some one as powerful as Deidra?
'Dancer blinked. What in two worlds possessed her to doubt her fighting skills?!? 'Dancer paused in that line of thought. Of all the twisted...she 'thralled me again!
Dropping any notion of fair play 'Dancer reached for Deidra's neck. When the shield stopped her she switched tactics and rammed into it, knocking the priestess-turned designer (and herself) over the side of the stage and into the saltwater-filled hole.
" 'Dancer, underwater, now!" Zelgadis called from his precarious position on the corner of the roof. Tossing the tome up into the air he began chanting. 'Dancer dove for all she was worth. A solitary fish floated over to retrieve the falling book...
"FIRE BALL!"
Wow. I thought most of that free floating hydrogen would have escaped by now.
"Air!" 'Dancer gasped, surfacing. Deidra clung miserably to a wooden crate, quietly crying. "All my plans, all those long hours working with airheads, and to come to this..." Deidra wiped her nose on the sleeve of her wet robe. "Now I'll never become a general of Evil!" She moaned, then glared at 'Dancer. "DIGGER-" 'Dancer swallowed and began climbing up the side of the hole. "BOLT-Eeeyaaah!" Deidra yelped as she electrocuted herself. 'Dancer opened her mouth to say something, then thought the better of it. She crawled out of the hole. The stage and various stalls were reduced to smoldering ash. Even the bricks of the surrounding buildings were even slightly melted. 'Dancer shook her head, then wrung the water out of her braid.
" 'Dancer?" Zelgadis strode into the square, then abruptly stopped and studied the ground. 'Dancer glanced down at herself, then turned her back to him.
"Give me five minutes, 'k?"