Star of the Sword Club he may be, Gourry wasn't particularly known for much else except for winning the school idol festival four years in a row. Mind you, he won that in drag. It was an 'honor' he would gladly leave behind once he graduated at the end of this school year. He was pretty sure he had burned all pictures of those damning events.
Now as to claims of him being dumber than a rock and twice as dense, that isn't true. It is hardly fair to the rock, classifying it with a human defined characteristic. You can hardly blame the rock for not happening to have the right combination of carbons, oxygens, and other elements to be considered organic. And I digress yet again. Gourry was about as smart as any average person, he just didn't care about learning the stuff. You know how it is, if you don't like or really care about something, you tend to ignore it. Hence the case with Gourry. There's also a thing relating to his family that a psychoanalyst would have tons of fun with but since I'm not one, we won't go into that.
Now roads and maps Gourry could remember. It was practical knowledge and if you gave him directions to a place, or a map, he'll remember it perfectly forever after. He won't like it if something is changed, like say a building fell in his way, but he wouldn't stand there waiting for it to get up.
So Gourry easily found himself before Sylphiel's home, a large mansion with a surrounding park that had once belonged to a...he forgot. Well, it must have been someone important because it was the only building of its kind in the city of Atlas. The guard dogs already knew him and he gave each a scratch behind the ears as he walked up to the house.
A non-descript man that Gourry knew only as Sylphiel's butler answered his knocking. What he did besides opening the door, Gourry had no idea. It seemed like a nice enough job for an old man.
"Good afternoon, Mister Gourry," the butler greeted, nodding his head at Gourry. "Miss Sylphiel is with her friends in the back kitchen."
"Okay, thanks. Have they made anything yet?"
A corner of the old man's lips twitched but he said nothing. Gourry shrugged and just let his feet do the walking. If the servant wasn't going to say anything, Gourry could remember from repeated experiences with his...family, that meant it was something bad along the lines of family-only or socially taboo. But Sylphiel was only teaching the new girl how to cook and if part of the building wasn't already on fire, then what could be wrong?
Blissfully ignorant of what hazards he may face upon entering a kitchen, Gourry pushed aside the large white swinging doors into... utter chaos. Not. Actually, the kitchen was not scorched, broken, or missing in any manner, shape, or form. There was a bit of a burnt smell in the air which could very well be explained by the somewhat blackened examples of cookies in the cookie sheet in Amelia's hands.
Hah. Bet you thought it was Lina.
"I told you they were going to get burned." Lina had spared a critical glance at Gourry just as he was opening the door but no longer paid any more attention to him as he wasn't a threat. Hey, it's these kinds of habits that keep you alive on the road.
"But Lina-san, the instructions said to bake them for ten to twelve minutes and I put it for exactly eleven!" protested the freshman, with all the blind conviction she could muster that if it was written so in the school text it had to be that way.
"Okay, first lesson Amelia. What you're told to do isn't always what's the right thing to do," Lina lectured, not really thinking about cooking at this point but more along the lines of several laws she...kind of broke during her adventuring days.
"You are both correct," Sylphiel quietly slipped in, preventing a long-winded debate on lawful versus chaotic alignments between the two girls. "Yes, Amelia, if you are unsure of how to do it, then you should follow what the text suggests. But it is only that, a suggestion that often works. When you cook, you're also free to go beyond or change the recipe's instructions as much as you feel is necessary. Now then, Lina-san, how are the cupcakes you were making?"
"Eh? Oh those? I left them in the cooking tin on the rack to cool bafore I...hey, get away from those!!" Lina yelled, grabbing the nearest object, only a spatula thankfully, and hurling it at the would-be cupcake thief, namely Gourry. It, the plastic cooking utensil, bounced off of Gourry's head, scoring absolutely no damage, not even stun.
Gourry turned around, half of a cupcake in his mouth, wondering what it was that brushed his head. It wasn't anything fatal or dangerous but he was still curious.
"Muff rus rhat?" He swallowed, remembering from countless raps on his head from his mother that it was impolite to talk with one's mouth full. "Not bad. A little on the plain side though."
"That's because they weren't done yet! And who let you eat one of my cupcakes!?" the redhead fumed.
"Hey, Sylphiel, what are you cooking in here?" he asked, lifting up the lid on one of the pots on the stove to peek inside. "This looks like one of my favorites. And this one. And this one. And - "
"Listen to me when I'm talking to you!!" Lina screamed to no avail. She tried to turn to Sylphiel for some support but the upperclassman's attention was solely devoted to Gourry.
"I don't think there's any food you don't like. Would you like some of it for dinner tonight?" Sylphiel blushed as she asked. Lina wondered if the candy heart frosting sprinkles were going to float up and dance now.
"Dinner?" For a moment, his face lit up like the sun but then dropped as he remembered something. "Actually, tonight I'm supposed to get dinner together for my uncle and I..."
"That's alright, I remembered that." She pointed to the three cloth-wrapped boxes of food on the kitchen table that no one had noticed before. "I already made portions for you to take home."
"Did she plan all of this?" Lina muttered under her breath as Amelia helped her add frosting to her cupcakes.
"Wow, that's great. I don't know what I'd do without your help, Sylphiel. Especially after we get out of school this year."
"I could still make you meals."
"Hasn't he caught on yet?" Lina looked to Amelia but the younger girl was just staring dreamily at the two upperclassmen, no doubt her vision tinged by pink clouds and cupids. She looked up to the ceiling because it was better than looking at the floor. "And I've got to live through two more years of this?"
"Why is this one so small?" Gourry asked, looking through the dinners. The one in question was about a quarter of the size of the other two, that is to say, it was a normal meal box. "This isn't for us is it?"
"Oh no. That was for Zelgadiss-san. I thought he was going to come and seeing as how he lives by himself and works - "
"Zelgadiss-san lives by himself???"
"Amelia, it isn't nice to interrupt," Lina pointed out. "What's the big deal about living by himself? I live by myself and I've been doing it for several years."
"Uso! How can your parents let you do that, Lina-san? What about robbers? What about rapists? What about - "
"Flare Arrow. Fireball. And if they really tick me off, a Mega Brando. When you're an adventurer Amelia, you have to know how to take care of yourself. You can't even expect to always sleep on a bed either. I've spent plenty of nights in a bedroll on lumpy ground with on the stars over head."
"Well if you want him to get it," Gourry said, answering Sylphiel's question that Lina couldn't hear over her own voice, "let the little girl bring it to him."
"Amelia-san?"
"No, the red head one with no chest."
"WHAT WAS THAT?!?!"
"Lina-san, please! Attacking Gourry-san would be considered an assault and it'll be recorded on your permanent record!" Amelia pleaded, holding back the foaming Lina with Sylphiel's help. "He didn't mean it in a bad way. He was just trying to identify you."
Lina's burning demon eyes turned to the dark hair girl. "So you're saying that my chest size is considered unusual enough to be used as an identifying mark?"
"Um, ano, that is," Amelia fumbled for a tactful way to get around this word trap. Given her time constraints, she decided for a change in topic. "Gourry-san! Why did you suggest that Lina-san bring Zelgadiss-san his dinner? They didn't seem to be getting along during lunchtime."
"But she's going to see him tonight."
"WHAT??" screamed the three girls. Yes, even Sylphiel screamed, though it wasn't nearly as loud as either Lina or Amelia.
"Lina-san, I thought you said you two weren't going out."
"Lying is very, very bad, Lina-san!"
"We said we didn't have a relationship!" Lina protested. "So of course we aren't going out! Gourry, where in the dim recesses of your head are you coming up with this?!"
"Lina-san, Gourry-sama wouldn't lie."
"He probably doesn't know how to," Amelia added in a low voice.
"Oh, so then you're saying that I'm lying?!"
"Well, he is tutoring her tonight isn't he?"
Stunned silence.
And then...
"Oh. But that's still good. Lina-san, why didn't you tell me you and Zelgadiss-san had decided that after we parted? I wouldn't have spent most of the afternoon trying to think of someone else to help you."
"Zelgadiss-san must have realized how cruel he was behaving earlier and to make it up and show how charitable he really is, he has agreed to tutor Lina-san! I must nominate him for a Good Citizen Award!"
"Is anyone listening to me?" Lina wailed. "For one thing, no, Zel and I have barely said two words to each other all afternoon. But if he thinks he can just flat out refuse me like that in front of everyone - "
"But it was just in front of the three of us," Amelia pointed out. Lina didn't listen.
"And then later, pop the announcement via Gourry that he is tutoring me and expect me to be overwhelmingly grateful then - "
"Lina-san," Sylphiel interrupted gently. "If you're angry because it hurts your pride to accept help and his refusal during lunch also hurt your pride, imagine how Zelgadiss-san feels knowing that he bluntly and clearly refused to tutor you before us and now has turned around to say he will."
"...well, who says he's even sincere or what Gourry is saying is true? What reason does he have to change his mind? He isn't the one in danger of failing!"
"You can ask him when you meet him," Sylphiel said simply, dropping the wrapped dinner in Lina's hands. "And you can give him this. On second thought, could you wait a moment while I get something together for you as well? You'll need a good dinner and probably some snacks as well for the late night. Judging from your lunch today, I estimate a meal the size of Gourry-sama's will do. Gourry-sama, could you tell Lina-san how to get to Zelgadiss-san's apartment? You do know where he lives don't you?"
"Huh? Oh yeah. Umm, do you have some pencil and paper I can use?" Gourry asked, rummaging through his own pockets for said items. "It's a bit hard to say it exactly. I can draw a map though."
Lina rolled her eyes and hoped Gourry wasn't going to give her directions to the city dump. If Atlas City had a dump.
Well, Lina thought, at least it wasn't a dump or numerous other unpleasant places. Far from it in fact, as Lina found herself in front of a quaint little ice cream and candy parlor after following Gourry's rather dubious directions. She was pretty sure she followed them correctly despite some of the directions being 'turn left at the building with adorable puppies in the window' and 'don't step on any sidewalk cracks'.
Great. She wasn't even familiar with the city yet. So even though she wouldn't admit it, Lina had next to no clue of how to get from here to her apartment on foot. Flying would have been easy but then you'd have the entire young adult population flying around so city law prohibited it.
"Well, as long as I'm here, I might as well get some ice cream," Lina sighed, shifting the weight of the meal boxes Sylphiel had given her. It was still too early for dinner. "Wonder what flavors they have?"
A bell chime at the door announced her rather awkward entrance but the children crowding the store didn't pay her any attention, transfixed by the sweets as they were. The poor clerk, emphasis on the poor part Lina thought, was trying to keep up with their orders and trying to keep his patience as each child changed his order at least three times.
Seeing as it may be awhile before the horde would leave, Lina snagged a chair in a corner that partially hid her from the counter, dropping her bags and boxes on the matching table. With nothing else to do, and to kind of keep her non-existent place in line, she watched the free entertainment. It even came with a human-sized pink bunny, which was the clerk, wearing a blue bow tie. Lina couldn't imagine that the guy was getting paid enough for this kind of humiliating job. She probably made more in one bandit camp raid than this poor sap did in one year. But then, he probably didn't have her spending habits either. That was the only reason she wasn't rolling in gold. Magical tomes and items cost money you know!
Lina was getting impatient by the time all but the last two kids had gotten what they wanted and left the store in giggling groups. These last two had hung back from the others, only coming up to the counter when everyone had left. It was blond girl about a year younger than Amelia and a little violet hair boy who looked to be in elementary school. For some reason, the clerk seemed much nicer to them. Amazing how she could tell that since the clerk didn't say more than a few words at a time. He even gave them an extra scoop and toppings for free. Must be special friends of his.
"When are you coming home?" the little boy asked, holding his triple scoop cone mix of rainbow sherbet, orange sherbet, and vanilla. "I miss you."
"We already went over this," the older girl scowled. "Nii-chan moved out to concentrate on his studying."
"But he can study in his room at home."
"But you bother him."
"I do not."
"Yes you do. You bother me all the time."
The little boy looked like he was going to cry.
"You can come over to my place whenever you want," the clerk said quickly to stem the flood of tears from bursting through the dam. So they were all related. "The sun is already beginning to set. You two hurry up and get home now."
Obediently, the sister and brother pair shuffled to the door, licking their ice cream cones. Lina looked after them wistfully, her sister never took her out to buy ice cream. Nee-chan did dump her in a well but that's hardly the same thing.
"Bye bye, Zel-niichan!" waved the little boy, his mouth a rainbow of colors from the sherbet.
Zel? It couldn't be...but just how many 'Zel's or 'Zelgadiss's could there be in one town?
"Zel?"
The bunny, who had just begun to relax behind the counter, suddenly stood straight up. Eyes hidden behind the furry costume quickly scanned the room that he thought was empty of customers. Stepping out from behind a potted plant was a high school student.
And that high school student was marching right up to the counter, a very evil gleam in her eye. She looked him up and down as if sizing him up for something.
"Can I have four scoops of mint chocolate cookie?" Lina asked sweetly. The clerk only nodded jerkily like a marionette, shuffling away from her as if she was a bug. What did he think she was going to do, eat him? Well, not quite.
The minute the clerk turned slightly away from her, Lina leaped onto the counter and grabbed the fake bunny head. She almost missed, the clerk had quick reflexes, but managed to grab hold of one of the ears.
"Ouch!" protested the clerk as she tore his head off, the bunny head, not his real head. Though to him, it could have felt the same. "Just what the hell are you doing?!"
"Ze...ze...zel..." Lina was laughing to hard to make a comprehensible sentence, holding the bunny head in one arm and pointing at a very annoyed and very embarrassed Zelgadiss Graywords in a pink furry bunny suit.