More than either of them would admit, if they were on civil speaking terms and not verbal pot shots usually thrown around corners or through open windows, Lina and Val had similar problems adjusting to school. Neither really wanted to be there in the first place and remained because of an authoritative figure they looked up to, both of whom happened to have be alumni of Slayers HS. Both were determined, after awhile, to be the top of the dogpile and had no qualms about blasting or breaking a few bodies if they felt like it.
Yes, Valgaav ended up in detention at the end of his first day, and was back several more times during the next couple of weeks. The school counselor, who didn't really seem to counsel anyone except a certain person with a stony exterior, gave a call to an old school mate.
Then that schoolmate called someone else in Sairaag who called someone in Dils who called someone in Zefilia who called the head of the real rulers of Elmekia (not that wimpy puppet emperor who really was a puppet) who called a wrong number which was picked up by someone in the Demon Sea who redirected them back to the operator of Atlas City. The phone on the city police chief's desk rang.
However, Gaav was out to lunch with his protege.
"How is school?" began the typical parent to child conversation about school over dinner. Except that the meal wasn't dinner, Gaav was not a parent, and Valgaav wasn't his child.
"Great," came the typical lie when in truth one's school life was going to hell. Of course, Valgaav couldn't truthfully say his school life had ever been any better or worse.
"Heard you've got eyes on a girl."
Valgaav choked, hand flailing as he tried to grab his drink to wash down whatever was blocking his windpipe.
"It's true, it's true. A new initiate to the great educational system, only several months old. A little spitfire, you know what they say. How briefly they shine, but oh how brightly," Xelloss nodded amiably, suddenly sitting in between the two and helping himself to Valgaav's soda.
"Isn't that what elves say about humans?" Gaav cocked a thick, hairy eyebrow.
"Or what the immortal say about the mortal."
"True."
Valgaav was still choking and turning an interesting shade of bluish-purple. His hands had managed to grab onto something, namely Xelloss's neck, and were throttling the teacher fiercely. Xelloss wasn't disturbed.
"Now, now, Valgaav, you must show better respect toward your teacher," Gaav reproved, leaning over to slap his ward a good hard one on the back. The stubborn wad of food obligingly went down. "After all, Xelloss was kind enough to call me in for a parent-teacher conference."
"So why is he eating my lunch?" Valgaav asked sullenly as Xelloss was helping himself to Valgaav's food. He planted a foot on his teacher's face and engaged in a tug-of-war with the plate of food. "Get your own food, you freak!"
"Very good. You're learning to control yourself," the police chief nodded sagely. "That's one of the important things taught in Slayers HS, that you must learn to control your outbursts and be their master, not their slave."
"Oh yes, Valgaav-kun is doing well. He only threatened two students last week with an iron pipe. Filia is most pleased not to have to treat anymore broken bones and damaged organs." Xelloss vanished as Valgaav lunged for him, reappearing in Valgaav's recently vacated seat. "The physical education instructor and the weapons instructor love him, not romantically of course, but he's the aggressive, quick learner they both love. In athletics, there are really little complaints about him, after he learned that live playmates are better than heavily injured or dead ones."
"So it's the academics isn't it? Not particularly my strong point in school either. Just couldn't stay awake in those classes and of course that pipsqueak Fibrizo was always telling the teacher on me and Dolphin kept braiding my hair. Ah, to go back and relive high school and the days of old. Young people can never appreciate how precious those days are."
"I'd really hate to interrupt your nostalgia," and Xelloss did sound very sincere, "but we're here to discuss about Valgaav, not you. Though I must admit there are some amazing similarities between you and your protege that I almost find it hard to believe that it is simply history repeating itself."
"Oh? How so? You mean Valgaav returning to school after being beat up by a girl?"
"I was NOT beat up by a girl! She just caught me by surprise. What kind of girl fights like that?" the aqua-haired partially reformed delinquent growled. "I've seen the wimps at the school and me and my gang have never had any problems with them."
"My gang and I," Xelloss corrected automatically. "Actually, Lina-san has had extensive experience in the area of self-defense. She has been on the road, half the time with her sister, since she was a child."
"You can expect nothing less from Luna Inverse's sister. She didn't take any crap from anyone. Headstrong, powerful, knew exactly what she wanted and that she was going to get it," Gaav sighed wistfully.
"Too bad her heart was set on that newbie student who came out of nowhere right? The one who on the very first day challenged that human Terim, now what was his name? Lez was it?" Xelloss winced as he could feel his arm crumbling under Gaav's death grip. "Ano, Gaav-san? My arm?"
"Hm? Oh sorry. Guess I mistook you for my stress squishy. My counselor suggested I should not bottle up my stress and frustration but release it before it became damaging to me. Now I remember why I don't particularly like remembering high school."
"Yes, yes. Zelas and Luna had such a tiff when Lez started really going after Terim. That's really the only thing they ever violently disagree about. No one was allowed to beat up Terim except Zelas and Luna wouldn't let anyone lay a finger on her dear Lez. That was one very unforgettable prom senior year, the hospital still remembers it. I don't believe we've had one, a prom not a hospital, since."
"I thought this was a conference about me."
Gaav and Xelloss looked at Valgaav as if he had either just showed up or he had changed suddenly to someone else. They simultaneously hit their fists in their hands. "Oh yeah."
"So what was it about Valgaav that you wanted to discuss with me? Academics? I must admit I don't have time to do as much mentoring as I would like but then, the mentoring position never really entailed full-time homework help. I probably wouldn't be much help anyway. 'C' student all the way, that's what I was," Gaav guffawed.
"Um, no, Valgaav-kun's classwork has actually improved considerably since his return. No doubt due to the...competitiveness he feels toward Lina-san," Xelloss winked slyly to Gaav. Gaav didn't get it. "A parallel perhaps? You know, you and Luna, Valgaav-kun and Lina-san..."
Gaav blinked, downed his drink in one toss, put it down, and blinked again. Suddenly, he leaped onto his seat, one foot on the chair's back. "This battle shall not be lost!! History will not repeat itself!!!"
The obligatory splashing ocean waves smashed into the flames of passion that also rose and just turned into a huge cloud of steam. From out of nowhere, black robed and masked stagehands waved 'Go Gaav-sama' and 'Banzai' flags as they ran past in the background.
Valgaav sweatdropped. It was a basic skill everyone was taught in the first grade. He felt he should be cheering Gaav-sama as well but there was this really bad feeling he was having in the pit of his stomach and no, it wasn't indigestion or food poisoning.
"Ano, Gaav-sama...this 'battle' you're talking about...it wouldn't be..."
Gaav clapped a heavy hand onto Valgaav's shoulders. "Do not worry my son (Valgaav: o.O). This is your youth, the time of memories and hopes and dreams. Young love can be harsh but I will help you every step of the way to win your lady's heart. Be it friend or foe, you will crush your rival for love and we, I mean you shall triumph!!"
Several strands of Valgaav's hair popped out in weird angles and directions and he was looking a trifle paler than usual. "Um, ano, Gaav-sama...it's not what you think..."
"There's no need to be shy now, Valgaav-kun. Didn't I say before that I would help you? If you don't act now, you'll regret it for the rest of your life and become a secretly bitter, obsessive, pining away man like your mentor here." Xelloss patted Gaav on the shoulder. "After all, it isn't just a hurt ego and sheer competitiveness that's driving you to try and excel in class. You're trying to prove your worth to Lina-san by out-competing your number one rival."
"And who is this blackheart who would get in the way of true love?!!"
Xelloss and Valgaav looked at Gaav. That sounded just plain weird coming out of the rugged man's mouth. Unfortunately, he was on a roll and any effort to slow him down would only make him accelerate.
"Zelgadiss-kun. You know, Terim and Zelas's oldest son, reigning champion of Freak of the City for the past year or so, in his mind at least," the teacher informed helpfully.
"So it is the son of an old friend, be as it may, I will not be moved. I will not have my protege miss out in the best time of his life. Of course, I have my job to do so," Gaav picked Xelloss up by his collar and tie, "why the hell are you helping us? You've always been the loyal puppy following Zelas around. Isn't helping the love rival of one of your charges going against the grain?"
"I just thought it might be interesting. Isn't love triangles, or even polygons in some cases, what high school is all about? Aside from pretty girls dancing around in skimpy outfits and doing very cheesy, sugary cute magical attacks."
Gaav turned green. "Please tell me that fad has not started up again. All of those poor demons."
"Not yet, it hasn't. Well, lunchtime is almost over and we'll need to be heading back to school. Valgaav-kun must work very hard to get over the hundreds of bad impressions he made during his first week. Oh, and thanks for the free lunch."
"You had an argument with your wife again?"
"Shhhh, Gaav-san. Not so loudly," Xelloss whispered to Gaav. "It would ruin my reputation if people actually knew I was married. Why, imagine the effect to my fan club. We'd have a mass case of cardiac arrest on our hands."
"I don't know how you've kept it a secret from everyone, even Zelas doesn't know does she." Gaav sighed. "So is it the couch or the sidewalk this time?"
"Actually, I'm forbidden from taking even one step into that city block. Soooo, I was just wondering if..."
"You can crash at my place? Fine, why not. It's not like it's the first time." The redhead police chief shook his head. "Why am I even doing this?"
"Because you were wandering around aimlessly, happened to pass by the chapel where we were getting married, and made a great witness to the ceremony," Xelloss smiled sweetly. That entire conversation was done out of Valgaav's range of hearing. "So come now, Valgaav-kun, the great battle for love awaits."
"For something that's supposed to be about me, I didn't get to say much," the student grumbled, rather annoyed at how his spotlight was stolen. "And I don't know where you get the ridiculous idea that I might like that loud-mouthed, violent, cute - "
"Hello, Lina-chan!"
Lina sneezed. Must be all the pollen in the air.
Xelloss looked at the frozen Valgaav, doing an even better impression of a statue than Zelgadiss. He snapped his fingers in front of the frozen, nervous eyes, made comments about the horn, even used a permanent black marker to draw silly doodles on Valgaav's face. Nope, the boy had gone into stiff paralysis.
"Lina-san wasn't even here," Xelloss sighed. Well, Valgaav was going to need a bit more work but there was the potential there. Now, as long as Zelas didn't get any whiff of his little scheme, he'd be able to sit back and watch the show. And if she did find out, well, he could always say he was following her orders. A little rivalry always got the blood flowing, even in Zel-kun.
"When did you get all of these gerbils?" Zelgadiss asked, looking at the hastily made pen in the corner of the chemistry lab.
Kitzero sweatdropped and looked very intently at the formation of crystals from an oversaturated solution.
Zelgadiss loomed behind him. "You didn't go testing unmarked potions on ignorant students again did you?"
"It wasn't my fault! Blame Grandfather!!"
"Did someone call me?" Rezo's voice came from the backroom before a dull 'thud' was heard. "Ouch. Why doesn't anyone tell me when they move these damn pillars."